Pastor David M.

For we cannot help speaking about what we have seen and heard.
— Acts 4:20 —

My Story: Pastor David Martin

My name is David Martin. I am the son of a pastor and have been in full time ministry for most of my professional career.

I was raised in a wonderful Christian home where I learned of my need for Christ and trusted the Lord Jesus for my salvation at an early age.

While not perfect, of course, I was always a good kid. I never really rebelled, and I embraced the faith of my parents who lived Christ’s life before me without hypocrisy.

But at age 13 or so, I was baby-sitting at a neighbor’s home when I happened to find a pornographic magazine. Even though I “knew better,” that opportunity to view something I had never seen before was so tantalizing that I didn’t even consider not looking at it. That first experience was so powerful that thereafter, I constantly found myself drawn to pornographic images.

For over thirty years, even through the years of my formal Bible training, into my years in pastoral ministry, and despite a healthy marriage, I battled the ever-present allure of porn. At times, I was more “successful” avoiding it than other times, but its draw never left me. I tried all of the typical strategies for overcoming lust and pursuing personal sexual purity: prayer, Scripture memory, accountability groups, prayer targeting, and just looking away. All these things helped me stay “clean” to some degree or another, but ultimately, every one of them failed. My commitment to the strategy would falter and the allure of the porn would grow. When an opportunity came along, I always knew I would falter again. And I did.

MyChainsAreGone.orgLike so many others, I measured “freedom” by how many days I had stayed “clean.” The time came in my life that was all the freedom I believed I could ever have. I assumed it was a battle which would periodically get the better of me for the rest of my life. I only hoped to be able to “manage” it… Not too much… Not too often.

In my study of God’s Word, I came to understand the nature of our bodies being crafted in God’s image… Literally… Physically. (If that’s startling to you, I encourage you to read my article about the Imago Dei) I came to realize that the way I had viewed our bodies all my life was actually insulting to the Creator who’s image is found in those bodies. I began to have more honorable thoughts about our bodies. And to my surprise, my interest in porn began to wane.

Soon, I could sense little or no interest in my heart for it. At first, I assumed that it was just a low point in the cycle of interest that I had experienced all my life. At the same time, I could tell that my disinterest was deeper and more abiding than it had ever been before. I found myself hating the porn for the distortions and lies it presented. I had hated it before, but this time, it was not mixed with the secret longing to see it again.

Ultimately, I realized that I had truly been set free. I walked away from pornography without any interest in looking back. I was open with my children, my father, and my extended family about my struggle for the first time in my life…  Because, for the for first time, I knew I wouldn’t be going back again.

This was true freedom. I had never experienced it before. The words of Jesus in John 8:32 had been powerfully fulfilled in my life: “you will know the truth, and the truth will make you free.” As a result of my discovering and living truth from God’s Word, freedom literally overtook me.

I wrote The Chain as an expression of my gratitude to the Lord for the change in my life. And I began to dream about starting this web site. God has now allowed me to draw close to some wonderful people who share my hatred for pornography and the destruction it brings upon so many.

If you are reading this, without a doubt you are either struggling with the allure of pornography or you know someone who is. It is our collective prayer that you will experience enduring freedom yourself and/or help others to it.

By His Grace

—  David Martin (aka “Pastor Ed”)

P.S. Previously, I only used my middle name, Ed on MCAG, going by “Pastor Ed” instead of the name most people know me by, David Martin. There were a variety of reasons for that decision—such as the fact that there were two other Davids on the MCAG team—but those reasons don’t seem to matter so much compared to being transparent about my identity. So, hereafter, I’ll sign my work, David Martin.


comments user

thankyou very much Pastor David Martin for this platform

comments user

Pastor thanks for the article .
I feel i can associate with you better after knowing that even as we struggle with our own problems there are those that were able to over come theirs. 💡

comments user

It is by mistake that i have read this article but i have been struggling with this sin for about
seven years. I fell a victim when i escorted my mothers’ friend to an internet cafe. This friend of hers told me to sit on the beach which was out the the cafe to wait for him. When i waited for long and i couldn’t see him come out, i went in to check for him walking quietly unfortunately ,i found him watching pornographic videos an images . i then rushed back to sit where he had told me to sit. Ever since that time pornography has costed me heavy losses spiritually,mentally and financially but if you over came then i also promise God never to turn back . I am tired, i want to live a complete life . I have been feeling guilty all the time but from this moment i am truly free and for ever.Amen. Thank you for the testimony you have healed me .Long live Pastor.

    comments user
    David Martin

    Jimmy, Thanks for writing.

    I urge you to read through the entire MCAG set of articles.

    You said that you “promise God never to turn back.”

    I made plenty such promises to God when I was struggling with porn, and I bet that you have too. I can assure you that it is not a bigger better stronger “promise” that will bring you freedom. Only the Truth will make you free (Jesus’ words in John 8:32).

    Read the articles. Ask God to enlighten you to His truth alone. Live as if that truth is true. And freedom will overtake you!

    Pastor David Martin

comments user
Brother in Christ

Pastor David,
Praise be to God that you’ve been set free. I hope to have the same freedom, soon. Although, there’s no pornography involved for me. Just masturbation. My sexual desire (now addiction) is such a stronghold in my life and I’ve fallen, repented, had a few days go by, and then fallen again. It’s like a never-ending cycle. Satan places nasty images in my mind and usually it’s just the thought of masturbating that excites me and puts me on the road to failure. What advice would you have for me, in my case? Thanks in advance.

    comments user
    David Martin

    Hey, BiC. Thanks for your comments.

    I would first recommend that you read the articles in the blog about masturbation. Here at MCAG, we have concluded that biblically, there’s no basis to claim that masturbation as a simple act is sinful. However, to be “mastered by” any habit is a problem… whether it’s masturbation or cracking your knuckles or eating M&M’s.

    If you are using masturbation as an “excuse” to engage your mind in lust and the objectification of other image-bearers, then that’s a problem, too. The opposite might also be a problem… your real “addiction” could be the objectification of people in your mind… using them to inflame your sexual desires, resulting in masturbation.

    Ultimately, I suspect that your first step may be in the effort to divorce masturbation from the lustful sexual objectification of others. That might seem impossible at the moment, but I recommend that you turn your attention towards what’s happening in your mind, not what’s happening with your hands. You might be fighting the wrong battle.

    Pastor David Martin

comments user

Hi Dave,

All of what you say makes sense and we are exploring this, but have a few questions, could you please help us in our journey of understanding?

1) My husband is discovering that as he looks at porn he has no desire for it anymore. Whilst he can admire a beautiful woman, he feels nothing sexual on her body parts as he used to. This is something very confusing to him because he thought sexual attraction to women’s bodies was a normal part of heterosexuality, so for example seeing attractive body parts has always illicited a small ‘jolt’ of sexual attraction which soon subsided and does not lead to wanting them sexually. This happens to him in daily life, and he says it is in no way lusting or wanting as he doesn’t want them in that way, but it was just normal heterosexual life for him. It is nothing compared to his feelings for me as his wife, which come from a different place, but is a simple recognition of attractiveness which informs the body. Once more it isn’t wanting, it is just sexually noticing – so how does that fit in with all of this? And without this jolt, wouldn’t you be demisexual or something?

2) The most confusing thing for us is that we enjoy each other’s physical body parts and find them sexy. I like to wear lingerie and my husband likes to see me in it, and we feel that it’s a part of love as it’s totally different to lusting in that the desire comes from a relational and heart place and ignites sexual desire and attraction. We feel like if we cannot actually enjoy each other’s body parts physically, and focus on certain body parts as part of our love dance of sex, that takes something away from our dance and enjoyment. Sexual desire is physical – it comes relationally but it delights in physical body parts sexually surely?! Can you please explain? 🙂

Thanks so much!

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